Emotionless Stranger
|
Emotionless Stranger Just my thoughts and reflections whilst im passing by... "Worship Allah as if you see him, And be in the world as if you were a stranger or someone traversing a way..." (Sahih Muslim)
My Thoughts... Saturday, July 16, 2005 Am I Evil Like You? Assalaamu alaykum You came back, bringing with you that nasty atmosphere you left with. That nasty feeling that was around before you went. I duno, I thought things would change, maybe your attitudes and ways would change,maybe you'd change, but hey, tough people dont change do they? Well my anger towards you came back too. I realised things between us wouldnt change and it got me pissed. I had no time to dwell on the whys and whats but one thing I knew was its life and I have to deal with it. Your ways and behaviour puzzled me. I didnt understand how people could be as such. But it was clear that it was all evil. I silently said to myself, well if thats the way you are, I shall be evil too. How id be like you I didnt know, coz it wasnt in me to be like that. I didnt know how to behave badly towards people in a malicious way. I had never done bad to anyone intentionaly, it wasnt in me to hurt others. But I knew it took two to play the game and I sure as hell was going to be the player to roll the ball with you. Later on, I went to my room to read. Reading is my sanctuary as you already know. As I opened my magazine; yes- an Islamic one, I do read them too, the first words that blared into my face were: "Oh my Son" Evil is not overcome with evil. Set off two fires and see if you can put one out with the other. Evil is overcome with good, Like fire is put out with water." Luqman the Wise. These words, I felt were written just for my sake. This message was mine. Something out there was telling me I couldnt change, just like you cant either. I cannot make myself be, what I aint. The only way to hopefully get rid of that barrier, or that stone on the path would be to act good to you. I guess life is full of lessons, every step we take on our journey through life teaches us a new lesson and this was mine, when I had taken that step. Emotionle s s~Stranger passed by on ; ``____x 6:50 PM
![]() Wednesday, July 06, 2005 The River of Tears Or in our case, is it the lack of it? Ibn Qayyim said: “The slave is not afflicted with a punishment greater than the hardening of the heart and being distant from Allah. For the Fire was created to melt the hardened heart. The most distant heart from Allah is the heart which is hardened. If the heart becomes hardened, the eye becomes dry." Emotionle s s~Stranger passed by on ; ``____x 12:32 AM
![]() Thursday, June 16, 2005 Doomsday Nearing. Assalaamu alaykum Time goes fast when your having a good time. Well maybe not a 'good' time but an average plus on the scale. Makes a difference compared to the continuous drag of days, when the day and nights all integrates into one and its all passed in a gloomy blur. No exxagguration here, but thats exactly how they are when my grans around. Sad to say but some people dont have your best interests at heart, nevermind best interests they only wish for your unhappiness. Well in four weeks that one person who does that to my life will be back. Im dreading it. I dont wana stick anymore of living in endless hell. I want out before then so God help me. Emotionle s s~Stranger passed by on ; ``____x 8:57 PM
![]() Friday, June 10, 2005 Assalaamu alaykum False illusions. Nothing shows up false without the true: the fool took false coinhoping it might be gold. If there were no genuine coin in the world, how would it be possible to pass fakes? Unless there is truth, how could there be lies? Falsity gets its value from the existence of truth. Some want the wrong in hope that it will be right Rumi Emotionle s s~Stranger passed by on ; ``____x 3:48 PM
![]() Friday, May 13, 2005 Lost All Sence No sence of direction. No sence of being. Where am I heading to? What am I doing here? Come to a dead end... going round and round in circles. Lost in the thick wilderness. I've lost all sence. I've lost my way. What was my purpose of being? What did I set out to achieve? Why can't I remeber the reason of my digression? Why don't I know the reason of my hindrence? Why am I stuck, unable to go on? Where is the way out? Where will the roadblocks in this jungle end? I've lost all sence. I've lost my way. No time to think. No energy to reason. Why do i suddenly feel lonely? When i've always been alone? Whats going on? Wheres the answers to my questions? Do i know the answers? Am i scared to answer them? Im I reluctant to solve them? I've lost all sence. I've lost my way. Whats that force buzzing in my head? Is it pain? Then why is it so intence? Why is it always there? Why does it kill? No energy to even forget about it. When will it die down? Or is it waiting to explode? Lost. But why? I don't know. I've lost all sence. I've lost my way. Is there an end to this? Am I allowed to pretend? Am I allowed to hope? How did I manage to trangress so damn far? Oh God, Show me the straight path. 'Coz I've lost all sence. I've lost my way. Emotionle s s~Stranger passed by on ; ``____x 1:30 PM
![]() Friday, May 06, 2005 Just for the Record: Assalaamu Alaykum
Thats all the news and views from me, im out. Emotionle s s~Stranger passed by on ; ``____x 4:32 PM
![]() Tuesday, May 03, 2005 The Truth That Lies You smile in the two way mirror of my eyes. I put on my faith like I wear a disguise. You can’t see my soul, see the life that I live. But I show you the mask of the best I can give. I’ve hid here, afraid, like a child behind, the truth of the thoughts that clutter my mind. What if you knew, about all that I do? The things that I think... the "me" that is true? Would you call me a hypocrite? Call me a liar? Would you curse out my name? Would you damn me to fire? Would you know what to say? Would you just walk away, afraid the "me" I've tried to hide, would too closely resemble the truth of you that lies inside? I've been looking for answers since becoming adult, not looking for dogma to live like a cult. Been looking to live, been living to find, freedom from cages that limit my mind. Would you call me a hypocrite? Call me a liar? Would you curse out my name? Would you damn me to fire? Would you know what to say? Would you just walk away, afraid the "me" I've tried to hide, would too closely resemble the truth of you that lies inside? I've been running and hiking and dreaming of flying, but falling and stumbling never shadowed my trying. So now here I am before God and you, showing my face and my true self to you. I'm not sacred of God, I trust God understands, but I'm wandering if you will still offer your hands. Will I scare you? Upset you? Frustrate you? Irrate you? Challenge your lifestyle or weaken your trust? Or will you see my effort? My passion? Sincerity? Will you see just a little of yourself in me? Will you take off your mask so we can be free? Would you call me a hypocrite? Call me a liar? Would you curse out my name? Would you damn me to fire? Would you know what to say? Would you just walk away, afraid the "me" I've tried to hide, would too closely resemble the truth of you that lies inside? (Dawud Wharnsby Ali) Emotionle s s~Stranger passed by on ; ``____x 10:06 AM
![]() The Strangers said...
*[[____ A Stranger passing by who claims to be emotionless... `-//* . . Emotionless Stranger . . Old Enough... . . Since when did travelers have a home? . . . blahhs. so thats about me.=x *[[___ My Blogosphere of Strangers`//* Aasiya Cheeky n Dai Coco Fuss GEM Live4Islam Nur Al Huda Princess Aaliyah Pwincy Saffron Diaz Shaquille Silent Tear zain Zed *[[___ Links`//* Simply IslamFrom the Sources Leicester Muslims SunniForum Dawud Wharnsby Ali
*[[___ Reflections from the past.., `-//*
[September 2003] |